Hectic.

This week has been by far the busiest week yet. Everyday of the week I had some test the next day, hc painting to work on, csf interview, being transferred into a fucking hard spanish class. Idk, all the stress and pressure just built up. Not to mention those wasted minutes thinking about you. Friday ended with an in class essay which I needed to get an A on, and right now I'm doubting myself. The football game was after school, but Jazlyn decided to take us to her house for the FIRST TIME EVER! I would've been more excited if it wasn't for that essay. Whatever. Anyways, when we got there, we found her doggie in the backyard and it was SO CUTE. Too bad Jazlyn sucks at being an owner. One day, I'm gonna kidnap her dog and take her home. Pebbles <3 so cute. anyways, it was hella mfcking hot, but we walked back to the game. and after a little while of waiting, I decided I needed a drink. When I was standing in line deciding on what to drink, DESMOND COMES IN AND RUNS TO ME WITH OPEN ARMS <3. And we just stood there hugging for like who knows how long. I miss that kid! Anyways, Dan and Chris Shao came behind him, and I gave them their hugs tooooo. Later on, me and lilz went to go buy pizza at pizza hut, that disappeared hella fast. The game went by pretty fast, and of course we lost to Bellarmine. Whatever though. By the time varsity game started, hella bell kids came and sat on the PIEDMONT side. wtfeezy, being all disrepectful and shit. Stupid freshman. hahahah, it's all good though. Simos was standing right there watching Alan staring the bell kids down and didn't even bother to stop them. He was just lookinn pisseddd. yeah, but it was good seeing all the bellguys again. Big Eric was there too! I was like wtf?!!? cause I saw him at the end of the game and he was like "MYMY!" out of nowhere! The aftermath of the game wasn't that great. But it's okay. I guess everything worked out today.


I sat at home all day, reading and having some time to myself.
It just made me realize how stupid I am, to keep making the wrong decisions.
I never know what is right, or maybe I do know but I really didn't want to follow it just because it felt right at that moment. I'm sorry. It's not like you feel the same anyways, it's not like you'll ever read this. It's not like you'll ever look at me the same and wish you were mine. It's not like anything you ever said was true. It's not like I can look in your eyes from across the room, and tell what you're thinking anymore. You never notice that I try, just for you. I feel pathetic for it, but I want to make YOU regret it. I wish you could come back and tell me everything's okay. I wish you could just talk to me again like how we used to. I thought I could tell you everything, but I guess not.

I'm upset with life at the moment.

Thanks Chupper!

MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:45:03 PM): DUDE
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:45:04 PM): WE HAVE
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:45:04 PM): LIKE
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:45:09 PM): 20394234 CLASSES TOGETHER
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:45:10 PM): SHIET PETER.
Petard xD (10:46:28 PM): LOL
Petard xD (10:46:28 PM): STALKER
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:46:33 PM): bitch
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:46:34 PM): please
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:46:38 PM): you followed me
Petard xD (10:46:42 PM): dude stop calling me bitch change that to master
Petard xD (10:46:44 PM): please
Petard xD (10:46:48 PM): you wish
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:47:24 PM): Omg.
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:47:28 PM): stop.
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:47:29 PM): just stop.
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:47:31 PM): youaint my master.
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:47:36 PM): my master has balls.
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:47:37 PM): sorry
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:47:38 PM): you dont.
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:47:40 PM): KEKEKEKEKEE
Petard xD (10:47:43 PM): damn striaght he does
Petard xD (10:47:52 PM): i got 2 and an anaconda
ATTENTION (10:49:46 PM):You are about to be rate limited. Please wait a few seconds before sending, to avoid being rate limited.ATTENTION (10:49:50 PM):You are no longer rate limited, and you may now send messages.MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:49:59 PM): UGH
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:50:00 PM): GROSS
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:50:02 PM): GROSS
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:50:04 PM): PLEASE
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:50:07 PM): ANACONADA?
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:50:07 PM): EW
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:57:43 PM): its for you
Petard xD (10:59:21 PM): back


Auto Response from MYMYubl0wmyMiND (10:59:21 PM): GROW A MFCKING PENIS.

THERE AINT NOTHIN TO TRIP OVER.
PSSSSSSSH.


Petard xD (10:59:22 PM): what
Petard xD (10:59:22 PM): ?
Petard xD (10:59:30 PM): LOL
Petard xD (10:59:31 PM): PLEASE
Petard xD (10:59:34 PM): YOU TRIP ALL THE TIME
Petard xD (10:59:37 PM): YEAH THAT AINT MY FOOT
Petard xD (10:59:38 PM): AHAHAHAHAH
Petard xD (10:59:47 PM): jk jk that shit would be so nasty
Petard xD (10:59:47 PM): -.-
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:00:38 PM): ...
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:01:02 PM): OH
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:01:03 PM): WHAT
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:01:04 PM): NOW

Petard xD (11:01:23 PM): WHAT


Auto Response from MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:01:23 PM): stupid bitch.

It's not like anything's there.
ACTING ALL HARD.
SHIEETT.


Petard xD (11:01:28 PM): I STILL GOT AN ANACONDA
Petard xD (11:01:42 PM): PLEASEEE
Petard xD (11:01:47 PM): I CAN MAKE SOMETHING HARD
Petard xD (11:01:51 PM): YES


Auto Response from MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:01:51 PM): WHY WOULD YOU BRAG ABOUT THAT.



Petard xD (11:01:56 PM): YOU KNOW WHAT THAT IS
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:02:38 PM): what
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:02:39 PM): is it
Petard xD (11:02:48 PM): I TOLD YOU


Auto Response from MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:02:48 PM): Thanks chupper <3.


Petard xD (11:02:55 PM): MY PENIS
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:02:59 PM): youre funny
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:03 PM): im posting this on myspace
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:05 PM): HAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:07 PM): HHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA
Hh
Petard xD (11:03:08 PM): OMG
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:08 PM): hAHAHAhAHAHA
Petard xD (11:03:10 PM): DON'T
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:10 PM): HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAH
Petard xD (11:03:12 PM): i swear
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:13 PM): HAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHA
Petard xD (11:03:14 PM): i won't talk to you
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:15 PM): HHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Petard xD (11:03:16 PM): ever again
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:18 PM): LMFAO
Petard xD (11:03:19 PM): you cna count on it
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:19 PM): LMFAO
Petard xD (11:03:20 PM): !
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:20 PM): LMFOA
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:22 PM): LMFAO
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:23 PM): LMFAO
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:24 PM): <3
MYMYubl0wmyMiND (11:03:25 PM): LKSDJLGSKDg
Petard xD (11:03:27 PM): OKAY I BLOCKS
Petard xD (11:03:30 PM): DUN DUN DUN
Petard xD (11:03:35 PM): BB
Petard xD (11:03:38 PM): I NEVER TALK TO YOU AGAIN

Regret.

I've been living the last couple weeks in regret, and pain. It's been bouncing back and forth between problems with the family, and problems with high school. I know I should be happy with what I have, because others in third world countries aren't as fortunate as I am. But there's a difference. I know there is. I just haven't figured it out yet. We live to please ourselves, our emotions. That's the only fcking reason I try so hard in school. I don't wanna feel like I'm useless and stupid. I wanna be the best person I can be. Be myself, show people I'm more than just a little girl who wants to have fun. There's more to a person than meets the eye. I've learned it the hard way, I've figured things out for myself, I've made mistakes. So many mistakes that I regret. I'm in the stage of looking for a bestfriend again, or just a friend that'll be by my side all the time. Idk, that sounds a bit clingy. Just someone I can tell everything too, and won't be judged for. I wish life wasn't so complicated, and I hate that I'm complaining so much right now, because things might get even worse later on. I feel like I'm not actually ever loved. By anyone. Maybe that's not true. But it's how aloof people are, about what they think that makes me want to try harder to be liked. So wtf..? It shouldn't be like this. I end up sad, and make things even worse. I miss the way things were when I was younger, when drama was just a crush breaking my heart. Those things don't even matter to me anymore. All those stupid tears feel so wasted.

I'm sorry if I hurt you.
I know you won't read this, but I'm trying my hardest.
I'm sorry I messed up.
I'm sorry life's so harsh right now.
I miss you.
I want our friendship back.

Just another day.

I hate how one of the major problem these days is having to be bored. I want to grow up faster, but at the same time I don't, and I'm going through that stupid teenage stage. But then again, what kid doesnt.. Sigh. I wish I had a better family, a nicer environment to live in. I wish my friends wouldn't have to be so complicated, and I wish life could be lived the way it should be. Why do we have to follow rules that our parents make up? It doesn't help us in any way. So wtfuck.
At least school was nice.
I wore my lanyard cause Jazlyn told me to, and Macasaet gave us extra credit for it !
ahah, Luc had a quiz prepared for us, but we ended up not taking it. kekeke, uhmm I got to spend time with Alison/Rachel during break and stuff. I was feelin all giddy and screamish. Until I got home.

WHAT A DEPRESSING POST.
GEEZ.

I hate haircuts.